Soiled Greens and Windmills
Issue at hand: Did Homer and Marge break the law when they had sex in public?
Credit: Screenshot from The Simpsons, Season 9, Episode 25, “Natural Born Kissers’' (17 May 1998). 20th Century Fox/Disney.
After feeling a lack of passion in their marriage, and realizing that fear is an aphrodisiac, Homer and Marge decide to spice things up by having sex in public places where there is a risk of getting caught.
Their passion tour includes a public area of a Bed and Breakfast and culminates in the windmill of a miniature golf course, much to the horror of Ned Flanders, who discovers the aftermath.
Ned: [Gasps] It was people! People soiled our green!
Maude: And now they’re out there somewhere, naked as the day God made them!
Chief Wiggum: Boy, I’ll tell ya. [Chuckles] They only come out at night. Or in this case, uh, the daytime.
Legal Question: Homer and Marge certainly found the spark they were looking for, but did they break the law in the process? Specifically, is it illegal to have sex in a semi-public area of a hotel or a miniature golf course, and what kind of penalties would they face in the real world?
Result: Homer and Marge violated indecent exposure and public nudity laws. Potentially face fine or jail time.
Legal Background: In most U.S. states, laws relating to sex and nudity in public generally fall under “exposure crimes.” It is important to distinguish between two common tiers of these offenses.
Public Nudity / Lewdness (The Lesser Offense): This is essentially just being naked where you shouldn’t be. It usually involves exposing private parts in a public place intentionally, but without the specific desire to sexually gratify oneself or another person. Think of streaking at a baseball game.
Indecent Exposure (The Serious Offense): This is what elevates mere nudity into a more serious sex crime. Most state laws boil indecent exposure down to fulfilling four factors simultaneously:
Exposing one’s private parts
Trying to sexually gratify oneself or another person (key difference from public nudity)
Intentionally
In a public place
Penalties and Enforcement: The punishment for basic public nudity is often a fine (usually capped around $1,000)1 or a short jail sentence (up to 6 months). Aggravating factors, such as being witnessed by a minor, can increase penalties.
However, because “Indecent Exposure” involves sexual intent, the stakes are much higher.
While enforcement varies wildly across the country, the real-world consequences for actual sex in public (as opposed to just skinny-dipping) can be severe. Florida, for example, is a known hotspot for enforcing these laws in places like gas stations and parking lots. The penalties there can be shocking: A man in Florida caught having sex on a beach was sentenced to 2.5 years in prison.
Perhaps most importantly, in many jurisdictions, a conviction for Indecent Exposure, because it involves sexual gratification, requires the defendant to register as a sex offender.
Application: So, did the Simpsons commit “Public Nudity” or “Indecent Exposure”?
If we look at the four typical legal factors for the more serious charge, Marge and Homer checked every box:
Did they expose their private parts? As Maude noted, they were “naked as the day God made them.” Yes.
Was it in a public place? A Bed & Breakfast common area and a mini-golf windmill are definitely places where the public has access and where one could reasonably expect to be seen. Yes.
Was it intentional? The entire plot of the episode was their specific intent to do this. Yes.
Were they attempting to sexually gratify one another? Undoubtedly. Yes.
So Homer and Marge absolutely violated indecent exposure laws. in the real world, they wouldn’t just be facing a fine, but could face potential jail time and might both have to register as sex offenders. Perhaps a bit more excitement than they bargained for!
https://www.findlaw.com/state/criminal-laws/indecent-exposure-laws-by-state.html